Because I Can't Clean

No really. I can't. Why can't I clean? Because my children have lost the tubes for my vacuum attachments. I've done the other stuff on my list for today, so now I'm just being annoyed about those tubes being lost.

I was telling my mom some of the shenanigans that have been happening around here and she said, "I hope you are writing these down." I said, sure, in all my spare time. Which really means "no." But since I'm just sitting here being annoyed, I guess that means I have free time, now.

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Do you remember me telling you about the time that Micah peed all over the bathroom because he "didn't notice" that the toilet lid was down? Well, apparently there is a gene for such behavior and it runs in our family. Emilia had the same thing happen to her the other day. Just as baffling to me. How, exactly, do you sit down on the toilet and NOT NOTICE that the lid is down?? Especially as you start peeing all over yourself. Hmmm...just not getting it. But that's 2 out of 4 that have had this issue. I can only assume it's somehow genetic. Not from my side, of course. :)

On the same day that Emilia didn't notice that the lid was down, Audra peed all over the bathroom floor because she couldn't figure out where to set the toys she was carrying while she went to the bathroom. Like all good two year olds, she waited until the very last possible second before sprinting to the bathroom, so there wasn't a lot of time for decision making and then once the deed was done, she stood stomping in the puddle because she was so upset about having wet her pants and STILL not knowing what to do with her toys.

On the same day that Emilia and Audra peed all over the bathroom floor, Micah joined in the party and peed all over the floor. He came out to the living room and said, "You might notice that I have on different pants. That's because I had to go poop and then I had to pee and I didn't realize that my pee could come out in the space between the lid and the toilet. So, my pants got wet, but it's ok because I put on clean ones."

Was there a puddle on the floor?

"A puddle?"

Yes, Did any get on the floor or was it all on your clothes?

"Hmm...I don't know. I didn't think about that. I'll go check...."

"Yep, there was a puddle, but I cleaned it up. Good thinking, mom!"

All three of these incidents happened before lunchtime. I kept Josiah from finding out about it, lest he feel the need to join in the fun.

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And as I was proofreading the above story, Audra jumped off the couch and said, "I didn't just pee on the couch."

But based on the dark spot I see over there, I'm think she's mistaken

At least I don't need vacuum tubes to clean that up.

Halloween 2012

I lucked out and didn't have to buy any costumes this year. Not only that, but everyone liked their costumes. Yay! It was a win for all of us.

Audra was a stunning Rapunzel this year. And cute as always!

Emilia was purple Cinderella again, but I think she was more of a PUNK Cinderella, with her purple hair and black boots. This costume was so her!

Josiah switched from Harry Potter to Ron Weasley this year. He was so thrilled when someone actually recognized him last night! (Most people thought he was Harry)

Micah man was a Ninja. He was most proud to tell everyone that we made his costume in 16 minutes. I think that might be a record for us.

My Darlin' Diva

Emilia's fashion tip for today requires you to hunt through your closet and find clothes that don't remotely fit you anymore, let alone match and preferably celebrate at least two separate holidays. Wear them. Wear them together and strut your stuff in clothes that are two sizes too small. You'll look just as awesome as she does.

If Only...

I wish it was as easy to post on this blog from my phone as it is to post on Facebook with my phone. Sadly, it is not, which is why you wonderful blog readers have been being neglected lately. It's not intentional, I promise. It's just so much easier and faster to post a picture and an update on Facebook!

But, in effort to keep us all on the same page, I'm here to let you all know that they boys started to learn to type today. They insisted that I find them a program and have been ever-so-kindly reminding me every day that they want to learn to type. They will sit by my side while I'm writing emails and just watch my fingers and make comments like, "I wish I could do that!" or "I can't wait until you find us a program so I can learn to type, too!"

Then, last week, one of the blogs I follow had a post on a FREE online typing program that kids really enjoy. Sweet! I'm all about the free programs! Today was the first day of typing and I had to make Micah stop after 45 minutes so that Josiah could have a turn. They're serious about learning this! After one day they both know the home row and several more keys!!

(The blog I referenced is Freely Educate and the program we are using is Dance Mat Typing)

Four Year Old Fabulousness

Me: I'm going to take a shower

Emilia: Why??

Me: 'Cause it's been awhile and I'm kinda stinky.

Emilia comes up to me and sniffs my shirt.

Emilia: You're not stinky! You smell like coffee.

I take my shower and come back out. She looks at the boys and says with, in a slightly ticked off sort of way,

Emilia: Mommy took a shower. Now she doesn't smell like coffee.

Me: Is that a bad thing?

Emilia: Yes!

Me: Maybe I should just shower in coffee next time.

Emilia: Ok.

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Emilia started playing soccer last weekend. It was kind of a rough start, but once we got a few details worked out, all was good. While we were getting ready to go, though, this was the conversation.

Me: You're almost ready to go. You're gonna be awesome!

Emilia: Yeah, I'm perf-norm-ick.

Me: Perfnormic? What's that mean?

Emilia: It's like being good, only better.

About 30 minutes later...

Me: What was that word of yours that means better than good?

Emilia: I don't remember. What was it?

Me: I don't know, that's why I asked you. I loved the word and I'm trying to remember it.

Emilia: Hmmmm...I don't know. Can't remember.

We think.

Me: Perfnormic!

Emilia: Yes! That's it! Now don't forget it, mommy.